There are some things a mother-in-law should never do with their daughter-in-law, whatever their intentions may be. Here are 10 of them, based on an article by Amberlee Lovell - according to Family Share.
1. The mother-in-law should not correct the parenting of the child
There is a reason why you are the parents of your children and not your mother-in-law . Your mother-in-law may disagree with your method, but she must know that it is your responsibility to raise your children first.
2. Your mother-in-law should not criticize you for your son
A marriage is between two people, and a legal mother is not part of that. Criticizing friends with her son only damages her son's marriage. Instead of just looking for the bad points of a daughter-in-law, be more tolerant and notice the good points of her daughter-in-law.
3. Your mother-in-law should never say to you, "Why don't you try it this way?"
Mother-in-law should let their daughter-in-law make her own mistake. Because the best way to learn is to experience it yourself instead of following anyone's advice.
4. Mother-in-law should appreciate the time your whole family spends with her
Amberlee said: "Of course, mother-in-law wanted to spend time with the family, but never found it appropriate to go somewhere with the family, and always nagged her son when she had time together."
5. Mother-in-law should not expect a son to put himself above his wife
The son already has a family of his own, and for sure his family will be on the top of his list of priorities. Mother-in-law may feel uncomfortable to know that she is no longer the number one woman in her son's life, but mother-in-law should learn to live with this reality.
Mother-in-law also never lets a son choose between mother and wife. Never.
6. Mother-in-law should not be cold to her daughter-in-law
A mother-in-law should respect the choices made by her wife and her children. The mother-in-law may disagree, but in the end it is the child's decision. Treating a daughter-in-law coldly will only ruin a daughter-in-law's relationship with a son.
7. A mother-in-law should not scold her daughter-in-law when she misses family events
Amberlee's message to her mother-in-law was: "Blaming me for not going to a family event that won't make your family want to come in the future. That will make your family want a lot of distance. more at family gatherings. "
8. Do not force husband and wife and children to live near her
One of the things a mother-in-law should not do with her daughter-in-law is to force her children to live near her. It is understandable that a mother wants her child and her family to live closer to her, but it should also be understood that her family has a life of her own.
9. Mother-in-law should not just expect his daughter-in-law to visit, but she should not
Both parties must be willing to visit each other. The mother-in-law should not just expect the daughter-in-law to try her best to visit without taking the initiative to visit her child's family.
10. Do not visit your child without notice
Mother-in-law cannot simply show up at the child's doorstep and expect to be welcomed and thoughtful. If the mother-in-law is going to visit the son's family, she should inform in advance, not just say that she will just drop by. This is especially important if there is a regular household situation where no one is at home, the couple and the children go to work and school.
See more:
Recognizing difficult mother-in-law and how to prepare "plan" to live in harmony
The mother-in-law conflict does not end because of the way she takes care of her mother-in-law
How to love mother-in-law and the secret to conquer every mother-in-law?